Saturday, September 27, 2008

party problem


You're having a party. YAY!
You're allowed to invite friends. YAY!
There's a limit on the friends. OK.
Mom says only 5 friends. OK.
Your list of best friends is 8. PROBLEM!
Now what will you do? You want a fun party with friends but you don't want to hurt anyone's feelings if they're not invited.
First check with your parents to see if you could add a couple more people. If they say yes then everything's ok. No? Ok, on to plan B. Ask if you could have a shorter party but invite 8 friends. plan C. Ask if you could have the party outside at a park or playground and invite 8 friends. plan D. maybe you want to go lower, have a smaller party and just have 2 friends. sometimes managing a lot of friends at one party can be stressful, if you know what I mean. Your party should be easy and fun and happy. You want kids who are nice to eachother. Kids who are nice to you. Kids who like going to parties to have fun and celebrate. Look forward to the party and have lots of fun that day. Kids will understand that you can't invite everyone you know to every party.

Thursday, September 18, 2008

oh no, parent - teacher night


Is your dad so embarrassing that if he goes to parent teacher night something terrible will happen? What if he tells one of his stupid fart jokes to your teacher? What if he actually farts in school? What if the teacher hears it? or smells it? I don't think you can ever go back to school again. just kidding.
Dads and teachers get along just fine. Of course, your dad might say something funny. Parents and teachers communicate differently than kids and teachers. Your teacher will think your dad is a happy, funny guy if he tells a dumb joke. Adults like that kind of stuff. The teacher will like your dad, too. When your teacher says, "hey I met your dad last night" and starts to smile, you'll know everything's cool. Ask if he did anything embarrassing. Say that you've heard all his crazy jokes a million times. Be proud that your dad took the time to go to school and meet your teachers. He wants to be sure that they are awesome people who are taking good care of you all day. which they are, of course. It's ok if he stands out in the teacher's mind as a funny person. Now if he was telling secrets about your stuffed animal collection.... or your special blanket that you've loved since you were born.... that's quite different. He would never do that. I hope. Don't get stressed about parent - teacher night. Let them meet each other. They all want you to do your best and be a smart, happy kid. Enjoy the attention. Have a great day at school tomorrow.

Monday, September 15, 2008

what's so funny?

Aunt Jen, kids in my class were laughing at a joke but I didn't get it.
I say you should just laugh along with them. Fake it. Smile.
It doesn't feel good when other people are laughing and you're not! Hey, it's not personal. They're kids laughing about something funny, not about you. That's good. You want to hang out with happy kids. Funny kids are.... um, funny. Maybe you missed something silly on a tv show. They could be laughing about a funny new video on youtube. Remember the big mac rap that everyone was talking about a while ago? If you never saw the video and you heard kids say CRISPY, you might have thought they were talking about lunch or a teacher's weird hair! If you saw the rap then you know it was a joke at the end about chicken. Watch it here. Keep in mind that the joke wasn't about you. You just laugh along and ask your best friend to explain the joke later. You could just blurt out "What's so funny?" They'll tell you. If they don't, it's really OK. Nobody gets every joke on earth.

Sunday, September 14, 2008

investigate the desk


What's on your favorite teacher's desk? What's on that scary teacher's desk?

What can you tell about your teacher by looking at that desk?

a. she's disorganized

b. she really likes to collect cat statues

c. she went sailing during summer vacation

d. she has cute kids of her own

e. she has cool stuff that you could talk to her about

The answer is ????
Go ahead. Investigate your teacher's desk. Don't be rude about it. Just casually look around at the stuff on there. It's not a good idea to start picking things up or rearranging those cat satues. Teachers decorate their classrooms and desks with things they like. They bring in things from home. Things from trips. Artwork their kids made. Things their friends gave them. I bet there are even decorations students made or gave them.

Are there things on the desk that you have in common? Maybe you like bendy action figures. Check the desk for action figures. Teachers are interesting people who have lots of experiences to share with you. Your teacher would love to talk about the personal things on her desk. but not during math class. Wait for the right time and ask a nice question. Get to know your teacher better. You'll enjoy being in the classroom even more when you have good relationship with the person in charge. happy students + happy teachers = happy school days
Who doesn't like happy school days?

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

move it, kid!


What I mean is, move your body. Exercise. Run around. Chase your pet. Ride a bike. It feels great. It's good for your muscles and blood and brain and even your mood. It's good for your bones and digestive system, too.

When do you get any exercise? You go to school all day. Most middle schools don't allow recess. gym time is really short. Are you required to sit in your seat and not even wiggle around? The day is not very active.

After school, time on the computer is sitting again. So is watching tv. That's not enough movement for your growing body. Experts would like young people to get about an hour of movement each day. Back in the day, kids had to chop wood and harvest crops and do tons of heavy chores. they hardly ever got to sit around. Ask your grandparents about it!


Check out this site for more info about more good reasons to move it, kid!



The site also has good ideas about how you can move your body.

Monday, September 8, 2008

really gross stuff


Which is the most disgusting thing you can experience in a classroom?
a. someone throws up
b. someone has a nose bleed
c. someone is picking his nose
d. someone is sniffing snot and refuses to use tissues
e. someone wipes his nose on his hand
f. someone coughs on your stuff
g. someone keeps sneezing right next to you
h. someone stuck gum under your desk and you touch it
i. someone picks scabs that bleed or ooze goo

All of the above are really gross. Equally gross to me. Actually the absolute grossest is when someone does any of the above things then touches your stuff. Picks up your pencil. Shares your book. Sits at your desk. Touches your computer. I'm getting the creeps just writing about it. So what can you do about this gross stuff? First, make sure you are not doing it. Any of it. That's right, we don't use sleeves in middle school. Go get tissues. Then use them. Then throw them in the trash. Then wash your hands. If your room doesn't have tissues then go to the bathroom and use toilet paper on your nose. Keep your gum away from the desks. Wrap it in a scrap of paper then throw it in the trash. don't leave your gum for other people. ever. Leave your scabs alone. Get a bandaid. Keep the scabs covered. your hands are dirty anyway and those scrapes won't heal when you touch them with your school-germ hands. If your stomach gets upset and you are going to throw up, take action. Get to the trash can. Get to the bathroom. Don't ask permission. Just get away from other kids and try your best to hit the can. Your teacher will understand. You won't get in trouble if you're sick.
Anyone who spends any time at school knows about all this gross stuff and more. Use good personal care. That means take care of yourself. Keep other people's germs out of your body. Try your best not to share your germs with other people. Use the bathroom sink at lunch time to wash your hands with soap before you touch your food.
If someone next to you seems to be trying to share germs tell them about the rules of self care.
Have a healthy, gross-free day!

Sunday, September 7, 2008

check your behavior


Um, about your behavior in school... how's it going?
1. Are you bringing all materials to class? You always have to bring something to write with, notebooks, and textbooks. Teachers get really irritated with students who come to class without the basic stuff. Keep some extra pencils in your locker. Have at least one with you at all times. It shows that you are ready to get work done, even if you really dont feel like it. fake it. Let's say you got to class without your book and your teacher starts getting mad at you and you hold up your pencil and say, "I'm partly prepared." then show your best puppy dog smile. I think you'll just get a warning and you might even be allowed to go to your locker and get the book you need.
2. Are you concentrating on the lesson? Hey, see that teacher standing in front of your class talking? Look. The teacher is talking to you. Yes. YOU. Of course, she is talking to some other kids at the same time, but you are being given information that you need to learn. Pay attention. Oh, I know it's hard. There are cute kids in your class who you need to watch. There are silly kids who might do something really funny and you could miss it if you concentrate on the teacher. There are juicy notes to write. Concentrate now. Play later. Concentrate now. Daydream later.
3. Are you talking out of turn? Put 28 people in one room. They all have stuff to say. About different things. At the same time. The word for that scene is chaos. Complete confusion. You know classrooms can't operate like that. That's why there's one person in charge. The teacher. He will allow others to speak but they must do it in an organized manner. Are you being cooperative with the system of taking turns when talking in class? If not, it's time to start. It's part of growing up.
4. One more thing to check today. Are you acting goofy behind the teacher's back? You know exactly what I mean. He turns to write on the board. You make monkey faces. He turns to get something out of the bookcase. You act like an octopus. He helps another kid and isn't looking at you. You put a Kick Me sign on someone's back. While this behavior is funny, it's not allowed in middle school. Maybe it was ok in 3rd or 4th grade but now we all need to get work done and we don't really have time for your silly stuff. It's immature. It's time to stop doing that.

group poop


Middle schools are packed with group projects. Groups are everywhere. Whether you love groups or hate groups, you cannot go to school in this century and avoid group projects.
Good stuff about groups: working together, talking about stuff, sharing ideas, less work for you to do.
Poopy stuff about groups: working together, talking about stuff, sharing ideas, less work for you to do.
Did you get that? The same exact things that lots of kids really like about groups can also be the things kids hate about groups.
Working together: Some kids are shy and working together can be hard for them. We all know kids who are super bossy and think they should control everyone in the group. That's so annoying.
Talking about stuff: sometimes groups get off task and talk about embarrassing stuff or ask really personal questions or go on and on talking about football.
Sharing ideas: We have problems here with kids who only give ideas but refuse to listen to ideas and kids who don't want to give ideas in case someone says they're stupid. Sometimes there can be so many ideas that groups have trouble deciding on the best ones to use.
Less work to do: Are you wondering how anyone could think this is a poopy part of groups? Hey, not everyone likes to share their work. What if I want the details to be just right but you have sloppy handwriting? What if we decided to use purple paper but then you only had pink. Those are the kind of details that a group member might like to control.
getting along with group members isn't always easy. If your group is having arguments, try to think about the feelings of the other kids. Can you be the group member who understands that kids can be uncomfortable and feel weird in groups? Can you remind yourself to stay on task and avoid embarrassing topics? Can you remind everyone that doing your best is important for each person it the group? Oh, also, try to avoid running to the teacher in the first second of a problem. You're getting old enough to talk calmly with the group. Try to help the kids in your group to see that each person has different skills. That's something you learn from working in groups, which brings us to why middle schools are packed with group projects. Because we all need to learn to work together. Peacefully. Calmly. Kindly. Productively. Have a happy group!

Thursday, September 4, 2008

teacher terrors

Yeah, some teachers can be scary. Have you ever heard that teachers should be really mean and strict in the beginning of the year to keep the kids on their best behavior? We know it's a terrible idea but some teachers think it works.
If your teacher seems too demanding, try not to panic. Don't take it personally. The scariness is not just meant for you. Remember, the teacher is trying to make the class behave.
Can you find any good things? Is the classroom decorated nicely? Are there pencils and paper and supplies for kids to use? Did the teacher explain classroom rules that are easy to understand? Well, all these things are signs of a teacher who loves middle school kids.
Check the lessons next. Do you understand the goal of a lesson? Can you get your homework finished in a reasonable time because you know what to do? Are there clear directions or steps to follow for projects?
Lots of us learn to love teachers who are demanding and push us to do our best even when we don't think we can. One more thing you could do is look for a student who had "scary teacher" last year. Ask what you can do to stay on the happy side, not the dark side.
Try to let yourself get adjusted to the teacher's style. See how you feel in 2 weeks. After that if you still feel scared then it might be time for your parents to have a little talk with the teacher.

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

hi honey, how was your day?


Here's the scene. You get home from school. You're in a pretty good mood.

parent: "hi honey, how was your day?"

you: "fine."

parent: "did you do anything fun today?"

you: "no."

parent: "do you have any homework?"

you: "I don't know."

parent: "what?"

you: "I don't know. Why do you keep asking me these stupid questions!"

parent: "Don't talk back to me. Go do your homework!"

you: "Fine! I don't know why you're always yelling at me!"

parent: "Watch your tone or you'll be grounded!"

you: "So what. You never let me do anything anyway!"

the end. You're both in a bad mood now.


It is possible to answer the old how was your day question without getting mad. Here's how you might play the scene with parent questions decoded.


parent: "hi honey, how was your day?" actually means what were you doing all day? were teachers nice to you? did anything embarrassing happen? do you have a crush on someone?


you: "It was ok. We did an experiment in science today." this answer is giving some information, which is what parents want. They miss you and worry about you. You're growing up and parents want to be sure everything is ok.


parent: "oh, cool. Is your science teacher nice?" actually means I hope the teachers (who I don't really know) are treating my sweetheart very nicely!
you: "yeah, she's nice. She wears this white lab coat when she does experiments." this answer is giving parents a little detail so they can picture what's going on at school.


parent: "do you have any homework?" actually means do you have any homework and how long will it take and do you need any special stuff to do the assignment?


you: "I have to write about the lab for homework." this answer is giving a detail about the work.


parent: "ok, let me know if you need help." actually means I'll help and I'll get to see what that lab was about.


you: "I will." think I just had an adult kind of conversation and that's cool.


the end. No anger.


Monday, September 1, 2008

hand outs and hand ins

parent papers. homework. announcements. meetings. practices. appointments.
Do you have all these papers to handle. Let's get organized.
Papers from school for parents? Ok, easy. Give them to your parents. You don't decide if your mom needs to know about the parent-teacher club. Just give her the papers from school.
Homework. Keep papers for each subject together. Don't throw your English homework in the science folder. You need it in English, not science. Teachers are not going to let you go to your locker all the time.
Announcements. Listen for news of things around your school. Look at signs. If you plan to play a winter sport, sign ups are in October. That seems really early but you won't know what to do if you're not looking and listening to announcements.
Meetings. Teams and music groups have meetings. Clubs have meetings. Write down the place and time. Tell your parents if you have to stay after school. Make sure you can get home after the meeting.
Practices. Try and get a schedule from your coach or director. Show it to your parents so they know your schedule.
Appointments. Lots of kids leave school for appointments at the orthodontist, doctor, and family stuff. Check with your teacher about any work you will (or did) miss while you're gone. Here's a good tip on teachers... DON'T say to a teacher, "Did you do anything while I was absent?"
Grrrrr. Teachers really hate that question. It makes them think that you're saying they probably didn't do any work at all. Ask like this, "Mr. Moyer, may I have the papers from yesterday's science lesson?" He'll say, "sure, there was one worksheet. Use page 61 in your book to help answer the questions." He'll think, wow. What a nice student. Really polite.